给幼儿园老师写的感谢信.doc

给幼儿园老师写的感谢信
第一篇：给幼儿园老师写的感谢信(发自肺腑)
园长、小一班全体老师：
你们，我是小一班杨xx的家长。在北京，xx有两个家，一个是小小的家，爸爸、妈妈和xx。一个是大家——幼儿园，有陈老师、y老师、小z老师 you a lot for your help/what you’ve done for me.

4. i’ll never forget your help and i will remember all the happy times we shared together.
5. i hope you can be happy/healthy, forever.
6. i wish you good luck/health!
【普通作】
dear miss wang:
i’m glad to write to you.
you are such a kind and easy-going teacher that we all like you. i remember that at first i hated learning new english words very much and i even wanted to give up. when you noticed this, you had a talk with me. you told me some good ways to remember those words and encouraged me never to give up. i’ve made great progress in english and now i’m a top student in english.
yours,
linda
点评：
本信息点齐全，层次比较清楚，语言比较通顺，句式也有一定的变化。作者首先用一个so...that 句式将老师随和、善良的特点勾勒出来，接下来回忆了老师是如何在自己当初因讨厌背单词而想放弃学英语时对自己无私的帮助。结尾处，对于老师的感谢和祝福也就水到渠成，感情真挚、自然。

当然，章的连贯和语言优化方面也还是可以进一步改进的。
【满分】
dear miss wang,
i’m glad to write to you. at this moment, words can no longer express my feelings.
how kind and responsible can a teacher be? you just gave me the perfect answer. i can clearly remember how much i hated learning new english words at first. to be honest, i really wanted to give up. as soon as you noticed this, you offered to help me by telling me some shortcuts to learn them. you never failed to encourage me even when i made only a little progress. little by little, my interest in english grew and now i’m a top student in english.

i want to say thanks to you. i will work harder in the future to live up to your expectations. i hope you can be happy and healthy forever.
yours
xiaoming
点评：
这篇修改后的作无论在语言表达以及章内涵方面都是相当优秀的。
首先，开头at this moment, words can no longer express my feelings. 短短的一句话便把作者此时的激动和对老师的感激之情表达得很充分。第二段首句的设问句how kind and responsible can a teacher be? 更是精彩。在描写自己起初对英语单词的厌烦时，作者用了一个how 所引导的宾语从句替代原的普通句式。
章的几个过渡语也是恰到处: to be honest, little by little等，均在一定程度上增