英语笑话--每日一笑.doc

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振翅高飞
何惧一搏
我
每日一笑
目录
What time is it now? - 1 -
Two Pieces of Cake - 2 -
My Boss and I - 2 -
Clean Glass - 4 -
Frog - 5 -
Limerick - 7 -
What Are The Two Words? - 8 -
He Swore to Die - 8 -
The New Baby - 9 -
A Gentleman - 10 -
I'm Glad - 11 -
A Silly Father - 13 -
Is He Dying? - 15 -
Six or Twelve? - 16 -
Rope or Ox? - 16 -
Are They Worn Out? - 17 -

2012/2/21
What time is it now?
The two boys were camping in the backyard. When they couldn't figure out what time it was, the first boy said to the second, "Start singing very loud."
"How will that help?" said the second boy.
"Just do it," insisted the first.
Both boys broke into song, singing at the top of their lungs. Moments later, a neighbor threw open her window and shouted, "Keep it down! Don't you know it's three o'clock in the morning?"
2012-2-5 20:34:01 上传下载附件( KB)现在几点了?
两个男孩子在后院露营,他们不知道到了晚上几点钟。于是,一个男孩对另外一个说:“我们开始大声唱歌就行了。”
“那就会知道时间吗?”第二个男孩问。
“只管唱吧。”第一个坚持道。
两个孩子开始大声唱歌,过了一会儿,一个邻居打开窗户喊道:“小声点!你们不知道现在是凌晨三点吗?”
2012/2/22
Two Pieces of Cake
Tom: Mom, can I have two pieces of cake, please?
Mom: Certainly-------take this piece and cut it two!
2012-2-5 20:31:15 上传
下载附件( KB)
两块蛋糕
汤姆:妈妈,我可以吃两块蛋糕吗?
妈妈:当然可以----拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧!
注:Pieces of Cake 非常容易的事
My Boss and I
When I take a long time, I am slow.
When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough.
When I don't do it, I am lazy.
When my boss doesn't do it, he is too busy.
When I do something without being told, I am trying to be smart.
When my boss does the same, that is initiative.
When I please my boss, I am ass-kissing.
When my boss pleases his boss, he is co-operating.
I do good, my boss never remembers.
When I do wrong, he never -2-5 20:27:18 上传下载附件( KB)
老板和我
我做事情花了长时间,是效率低;
老板做事情花了长时间,是深思熟虑。
我没有做完事情,是懒惰;
老板没有做完事情,是太繁忙。
没有人告诉我的事情我做了,是自作聪明;
老板做了同样的事情,是首创。
我取悦老板,是献媚;
老板取悦他的老板,是合作。
我干得好,老板从来不会想起;
我干得不好,老板从来不会忘记。
Cl