英语笑话--每日一笑.docx

英语笑话--每日一笑.docx学习英语贵在坚持!每日英语,天天更新!旦养成良好的学习习惯!有计划的学习,积少成多,一定能够学好英语!振翅高飞a』G何惧■搏y每日笑Whattimeisitnow? -1-TwoPiecesofCake -2 -MyBossandI ・2 ・CleanGlass ・4 -Frog ■5 ■Limerick ・7 -WhatAreTheTwoWords? - 8 -HeSwored)toDie ・8 -TheNewBaby ・9-AGentleman ・10 ■rmGlad -11 ■ASillyFather -13 ■IsHeDying? ・15 -SixorTwelve? ・16 ■RopeorOx? -16-AreTheyWornOut? ・17■2012/2/21Whattimeisitnow?Thetwoboyswerecampinginthebackyard・Whentheycouldn'tfigureoutwhattimeitwas,thefirstboysaidtothesecond,"Startsingingveryloud:HHowwillthathelp?”saidthesecondboy."Justdoit,,singingatthetopoftheirlungs・Momentslater,aneighborthrewopenherwindowandshouted,"Keepitdown!Don'tyouknowit'sthreeo'clockinthemorning?"现在几点了?两个男孩子在后院露营,他们不知道到了晚上几点钟。于是,一个男孩对另外一个说:“我们开始大声唱歌就行了。55“那就会知道时间吗?”第二个男孩问。“只管唱吧。”第一个坚持道。两个孩子开始大声唱歌,过了一会儿,一个邻居打开窗户喊道:“小声点!你们不知道现在是凌晨三点吗?”2012/2/22TwoPiecesofCakeTom:Mom,canIhavetwopiecesofcake,please?Mom:Certainly takethispieceandcutittwo!两块蛋糕 |f汤姆:妈妈,我可以吃两块蛋糕吗?妈妈:当然可以•…拿这块蛋糕把它切成两块吧!注:PiecesofCake非常容易的事MyBossandIWhenItakealongtime,Iamslow・Whenmybosstakesalongtime,heisthorough・WhenIdon'tdoit,'tdoit,heistoobusy・WhenIdosomethingwithoutbeingtold,Iamtryingtobesmart・Whenmybossdoesthesame,thatisinitiative・WhenIpleasemyboss,Iamass-kissing・Whenmybosspleaseshisboss,heisco-,,,是效率低;老板做事情花了长时间,是深思熟虑。我没有做完事情,是懒惰; .老板没有做完事情,是太繁忙。,没有人告诉我的事情我做了,是自作聪明;老板做了同样的事情,是首创。我取悦老板,是献媚;老板取悦他的老板,是合作。我干得好,老板从来不会想起;我干得不好,老板从来不会忘记。CleanGlassJoeandFredwerehelpingtobuildahouseinavillage・Theweatherwasverywarm,therewasalotofdusteverywhere,andbyhalfpasttwelve,theywereverythirsty,sotheystoppedworktohavetheirlunch・Theyfoundthenearestsmallbar,wentinandsatdownwiththeirsandwiches・"Goodafternoon,?Mthemanbehindthebarasked・JoelookedatFredandsaid,"Beer,,,Fred?”"Yes,thafsallright/,"AndIwantitinacleanglass!Don'etthat."Theman