老友记第一季剧本.docx

《F r i ends》 居U 本（第
101 The One Where Mon ica Gets a New Roommate (The Pilot-The Un cut Versio n)
[Scene: Cen tral Perk, Chan dler, Joey, Phoebe, and Monica are there.]
Monica: There's nothing to tell! He's just some guy I work with!
没什么好说的！他不过是我的同事！
Joey: C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There's gotta be something wrong with him!
少来了，你和那个人一起出去！和你交往的男人一定有问题！
Chandler: All right Joey, be nice. So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
打住，乔伊，最下留德。他驼背？即驼背又戴假发？
Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk?
慢着，他吃粉笔吗？
(They all stare, bemused.)
Phoebe: Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go through what I went through with Carl- oh!
我只是不想你重蹈我和卡尔的覆辙
Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not havi ng sex.
各位别急，这不算是约会。我们不过是出去一起吃晚餐，而不是做爱。
Chan dler: Sounds like a date to me.
听起来像是说我的约会。
[Time Lapse]
Chandler: Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'm standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally n aked.
记得中学时代的梦， 我站在自助餐厅， 突然发现自己全身赤裸。
All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.
我做过那样的梦。
Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize there's a phone... there.
我低头一看， 看见有一支电话……在那儿。
Joey: In stead of...?
而不是 ?
Cha ndler: That's right.
没错。
Joey: Never had that dream.
我没做过那样的梦
Phoebe: No.
没有
Cha ndler: All of a sudde n, the phone starts to ring. Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts look ing at me.
那支电话突然响起， 而我不知道怎么办， 每个人都开始望着我。
Monica: And they weren't looking at you before?!
他们以前不看你吗？ Chandler: Finally, I figure I'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother, which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!
结果是我妈打来， 我感到很奇怪， 因为我妈不曾打过电话给我！ [Time Lapse, Ross has entered.] Ross: (mortified) Hi.
嗨 Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
这家伙向我打招呼时我就想自杀。 Monica: Are you okay, sweetie?
你还好吧？
Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around my neck...
我感觉有人把手伸入我的喉咙 抓起我的肠子， 从我的口中取